Learn To Forgive

One of the most difficult things to do in life is forgiving people of the offences committed against one.

One of the most difficult things to do in life is forgiving people of the offenses committed against one. It’s really tough, and sadly it hinders one from making heaven at last. Even among the so-called born-again Christians, there are many who cannot just forgive people. It’s easier to tell people to forgive, but when you find yourself in that situation, would you really do the same? A young lady once told me she would never forgive her father. When eventually she told me her reasons --- the unprintable and despicable things the father did to the mother, I became speechless, completely dumbfounded!

One would say the story is one-sided but mind you, her story was balanced; she never took sides. Humanly speaking, some offenses look unforgivable, but one must ask for that grace to forgive. Imagine a man who had three children and took care of them because they were his children, only to find out after a DNA test that those children aren’t his! If you were the man, would you forgive? Or a woman whose husband had a child outside their marriage but never told the wife, only for her to find out. If you were the woman, would you forgive? In all the few years I have spent on this planet, I have lost count of those who have really offended me, yet I had to let go, though not so easy, definitely not so easy on my part! I have come to realize that holding grudges against your offender surely imparts health and denies one of true tranquility.

Holding offenses in your heart is like a burden that eventually affects you psychologically. The best is to let go so you can have your peace. My dear friend, I wouldn’t know who has offended you or what offense it is but try and let go. Unforgiveness hinders one’s prayers, and it makes one not have a good relationship with God. 

How can you easily forgive? Follow the principles below:

1. People must offend you... offenses will surely come but just see it as a duty to let it slide.

2. Learn to excuse people for their actions. Make it a point of duty to just give yourself reasons why they act that way and why you should forgive. 

3. Learn to overlook people’s actions and not take them to heart. Human beings are generally wicked.

4. Understand shortcomings and human frailties because, as humans, we are not infallible.

5. Do not buy time before you forgive. Let your forgiveness be immediate.

6. Do not wait for an apology before you forgive. Apologize on your offender’s behalf.

7. Imagine you were the offender...would you love to be forgiven? 

8. Finally, where you still find it hard to forgive, then PRAY to God.

As today marks the beginning of a new week, let us release everyone who has offended us from the prison of our hearts. Only then will we find true happiness and have a good relationship with God and with people.

Lawrence Jude

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