Letter To Awaiting Bride's Mother!

It's about what the priority of a potential Bride's Mother should be...Dear Awaiting Bride's Mother, Listen To Me Please! By Abdulmumeen Abdulrazaq

The feeling that someone's daughter is going into a conjugal home is a great feeling, but as an awaiting bride's mother, what should be your priority?

Ma, please note that no matter how well you trained your daughter (bride) and how excellent she's morally brought up, once she missteps into a miserable marriage, she will always be unbalanced for the rest of her life. Only a few were lucky to have come out of such calamitous marriages. As the wedding approaches, the number of people who buy or who do not buy aso ebi should be less of your concern. What should be your concern is the destination your daughter is going. She is venturing into a new facet of life, and it could be either good or bad, though no one prays for the latter. There are enemies within the family of the groom that she would automatically inherit. That enough should be a headache for you; thus, you need to engage in frantic and fervent prayers for her in order not to be overwhelmed by enemies. That she's matured for marriage is not enough because marriage turbulences go beyond maturity and age.

The wedding day is a day when the bride's parents, especially the bride's mother, need to rejoice less because their daughter is going into unfamiliar terrain. Postpone the merry-go-round till after five years of stable marriage. Any time I attend a wedding, and I see the bride's mother dancing uncontrollably like an electric robot in front of the invited musician, I am always discomfiture with where such confidence is coming from. Yes, she needs to dance and rejoice, but she needs prayer more for her outgoing daughter. Ma, even if your daughter is marrying your best friend's son, it does not guarantee that the marriage will last. Don't get carried away with the finest faces on your daughter's wedding day. Most of them have ugly hearts. Some of your in-laws are ready to devour your daughter at any slightest provocation. 

Also, wisely choose the type of wedding that suits your financial status and that of the groom's family. A flamboyant wedding does not guarantee a happy home. Likewise, a placid wedding does not mean a potential bride would not enjoy her new union. We are in a debased society where people equate elaborate marriage with a happy home. No, the reverse is always the case because most flamboyant marriages crash early. It is in this part where families of both groom and bride spend an exorbitant amount of money on a wedding, and afterward, the whole fanfare, the couple would still go and rent an apartment to live. Is that not a misplaced priority? Is that not the wrong channelization of the fund? The money could have been better used to either set up a business for the couple, buy a car for them, or even construct a minor apartment for them.  

Ma, as your daughter's wedding approaches, set your priority right by moving close to your God and pray fervently for your daughter not to encounter misery in her marriage. Prepare her not to be a liability to the family she is going into. And lastly, endeavor to advise her that PATIENCE, LOVE, ENDURANCE, AND PERSEVERANCE are the key ingredients of marriage.

Abdulmumeen Abdulrazaq

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