Not A Story

Every artist at one point tells their story; Or something about how they gained footing

Every artist at one point tells their story
Or something about how they gained footing
Since im always shutting out the memories
Guess i really ain't authentic
But i don't wanna be a cry baby
Wailing over spilled milk
By telling y'all about me
Guess That's just how i see it

But then I'm trying to change perspective
Trying to understand why it's problematic
For me to just do the damn thing
And be rid of my skeletons
Not that i got actual ones in my closet
Perhaps i should let you be the judge of that
Bet it won't change a thing
Cause I'm just a victim of circumstance

We had a dark background
Mom tried to repaint it to white
She really did a hella job
Guess the paint just wouldn't come off
Hence it became up to us
To choose the colors our Palette bore
We could've picked all white just like she taught
Guess we never were rid of the Black in our blood

So we considered other options
I mean a little red wouldn't hurt
Besides we needed to be tough
Hence danger was welcome to dwell in us
Mom tried to talk us out 
Went as far as going to God
Didnt stop in Church but climbed the rocks
But then God's not a dictator

Blue became fascinating
There were many shades in its collection
I chose to love from a distance
Far enough to not leave a trace back
Family became distant
And all these seemed normal
We were all trying to paint a picture 
Out of the mess we were made of

Despite all these i kept it cool
Always ensured i was in control
Never overreacting or emphasizing
Kept being the good boy i was brought up to be
Then the darkness came knocking
All i wanted was to be set free
Tried to pick up new things
But i got lost in the process

Feeling locked up in myself
Was just all i needed
To reflect on what i wanted
And what I really needed
I took it one at a time
Learning to crawl just like a child
Starting over cause it was a new life
That i had control of this time

So far its been No easy task
Its no wonder I was scared of growing up
But the difference is clear this time
I Ain't gonna play the victim of circumstance
Cause now i get to pick my colors
Starting with my background first
With God determining my progression
My Picture's gonna be fabulous

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