Chiamaka Ajunwa 1 year ago
@theuntamedwrit... 3 min read Write a comment #short-stories

"welcome To Kukuve"

Life at Kukuve Hostel....Why students and families shouldn't live together on campus.

Kukuve Hostel is the only hostel in Vali Town and the entire school campus that houses both students and family people. Mondays are normal days. Tuesdays and Wednesdays are post-normal days. Thursday to Saturday, nko? There must be a power outage as a result of disconnected light issues. Mama Kasarachi must bleach palm kernel oil every evening...Especially when she always resorts to using firewood...The general tap must get broken by the Dime triplets from hell...And In situations like this, one bath equals #100, according to the landlord..Well, considering a family of five...They know the right thing to do...

Today, being Sunday evening, after everyone had returned from church, Ubani, the lodge presidents of block A, and Papa Dime of block B had a serious argument as the lodge President for the student's block told the lodge President for the family lodge, to go and find new lodges for his people.."Shey na me build a house?" Papa Dime snaps. His loosely tied wrapper at his waist keeps swaying from the evening breeze.

"You are not serious, ooo. Since last two months, your people have refused to pay the light bill," Ubani snaps back. He then continues, "But you will use all the electrical appliances in this world, still yet, you won't pay shi shi" "I think the correct word is "YET" or "STILL" There's nothing like still yet" Lekan, an English student corrects. "Olofofo, won't you keep quiet? You will just be "chunking" your mouth for wetin no contain you," Segun, his roommate, fires.

"Abeg, abeg, abeg, no be you, wey dey throw a party every weekend? You think say we no know abi? Na, so you go just high your stereo, so tey, pesin ear wan tear," Papa Dime questions Ubani."See this idiot ooo. Papa Dime, make I no talk how you and Mama Kasarachi dey always rub body too ooo," Ubani sneers. Mama Kasarachi: "Eh?!" She nearly falls down from her kitchen stool. The animals in the compound: "Thank God we're not human beings" "Yes, thank God, ooo."

Students: "Obara Jesus," "Eweeh," "After doing morning cry every Sunday. "Ha! Na wa oh" "Dey play, just dey play" "Omo!"

Family tenants: "Nwunye landlord, eziokwu?" "I knew it!" "I said it!" "No wonder she ties only wrapper when going to see Papa Dime" "And she will still carry Bible. Ndi mmadu sef" Other little children:"---" And so, Chief Odinaka, the landlord, hasn't returned yet from his six months business trip... Every day it's family vs. students... Well, what did kanai say?😬

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