What I Never Thought Would Happen

George had always seemed like the perfect kind of man, dressed nice, acted promptly and most importantly, he respected his girlfriend’s decisions. What she didn’t know is that everyone has one form of demon that they are trying to escape.

If someone had told me George would try to do what he tried to do to me, I would have labeled the person "mad." George had always had my trust right from time. The second we met, he struck me as the dependable, respectful, and chilled kind of guy. He never changed. It was crazy how he was so nurtured and never misbehaved. I was lucky. But that was until the night of May 4th. I look back at that day, and goosebumps erupt on my skin, and I feel a strong urge to go into hibernation.

May 4th was a day that I had been looking forward to; It was the night of my best friend's party. I had been so swarmed and zonked out from work and family duties. This party was a breath of fresh air. I wasn't the party kind. I would choose a night of Netflix and ice cream over a night of partying. But I needed reckless behavior this night. I needed to dance, drink, to spend some time with friends. Dayo, my best friend, always had the best stories- from her relationships to her product management job to the chronicles of driving on Lagos road. She was like a jester and always brought smiles to people's faces. I needed that.

This isn't a story about my relationship with my best friend. This is a story about how I thought George was the best for me. After the thrilling, fun night, I decided to go back home with George. One, I didn't want my big brother to see me drunk, and I wanted to be with my boyfriend. Not in that way. Just to be with him. Stay in the same space with him. George's kisses hypnotize me each time. It's the way his expert lips move so swiftly and perfectly on my skin. Dayo once called it a drug that I was highly addicted to. No jokes. But tonight, I didn't need that. I didn't need action. I needed sleep.

"I'm tired…" I took a breath from our heavy make-out session. He only smiled in response. I wrapped my arms around him," I need to sleep for like a thousand years." "Are you drunk?" He questioned. "No, I'm just tired." I hoped he could see it in my eyes. He sighed heavily and said against my lips," Why is it that whenever we want to be together, you're tired?" I shrugged innocently and answered," Because I work hard." "But you've been dancing tonight." "And I'm tired." I let out a chuckle," I promise you that tomorrow I'll have your time." "Really?" He smiled and then buried his face in the crook of my neck, kissing it. I smiled and muttered," Really? I promise you." "Are you sure?" His tone began to be heavy with desire. "I swear to you," I answered, then winced when he bit a particular spot too hard. "G…" I called out to stop him.

He didn't pause or acknowledge my calling. Instead, he sank his teeth deeper into my skin. The level of fear and disgust rose in me, and he couldn't sense it. "Okay, that's enough…." I muttered with a few chuckles. Still no answer, instead in response, he tightened his hold around me. He began to maul me. George's touches have always been good- not this one. He made me feel extremely uncomfortable. "George…." I called out again. His hands moved swiftly from my backside to my lower belly. I believe this is the moment I had to snap. He tried to push his hand in, and that's when…. I snapped.

"Get away from me!" I said right after I pushed him away. His eyes were still heavy with desire, but this time, anger ran through them also. "That hurt." I placed a hand on my neck to inspect a bruise or bleeding," I said not tonight, babe" His words were swift and painful," But when you dated that stupid boy, you gave it to him anywhere and anyhow, even when he was married." My palm collided with his cheek. My reaction was harsh and wasn't thought through. Yes, I let my emotions get the best of me. "George." I took a deep breath and set my eyes on him. His eyes weren't filled with desire and lust only, but a flash of madness. He prowled towards me," Sorry?" "Sorry. I shouldn't have hit you…." I quickly started to apologize. I wasn't the kind to get physical, but George knew more than anyone that I hated being reminded about my mistakes. I had a relationship with a married man, but it was a mistake. I have grown since then.

"Oh." He said concerning my apology. His taciturn self scared me, for God's sake. I took steps backward," It's just that…I think we're tired, and we need to cool down...." "Hmmm…." He narrowed his eyes in response. I paused in my tracks, and he towered over me, using his height as an advantage. "I can't sleep with you tonight." I chose to be verbal about it," I am tired, and it isn't the right time." "That's not my business." His answer shocked me. I narrowed my brows, and anger waved through me," Excuse me? George that doesn't matter to me if you care or not. I'm not…." "Sarah, you do what is best for you in this relationship. What about my needs?" I scoffed," Are you seriously having a tantrum over this? I said I was tired. It's no big deal." "IT IS A BIG DEAL!" He roared in my face," IT IS A FUCKING DEAL! WHO THE HELL_."

At a point, I zoned out, watching him yell and throw a fuss. I wondered how someone as sweet as him could react like it. It had to be alcohol because why else would he yell at me for not wanting to have sex? I mean, it was just sex. The fact that he wanted it so badly annoyed me. I had to give consent, and with the way he was behaving, I chose NOT TO. "I AM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU!" I yelled back at him, which shocked and silenced him," IF YOU CHOOSE TO HAVE A TEMPER TANTRUM OVER THIS, GO ON, BUT I REMIND YOU THAT THIS IS MY BODY AND I HAVE TO GIVE CONSENT, AND I TELL YOU NO. GO AND BRING YOUR POLICE!" "OH REALLY?!" He didn't back down even after he had made me upset.

"THE ONLY WAY YOU'RE SLEEPING WITH ME IS IF YOU RAPE ME!" I YELLED OUT," AND I TRUST THAT YOU'RE NOT STUPID ENOUGH TO DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT." I spoke too soon. George was stupid enough to do that. Before I turned away from him, George's demon manifested. He spun me around and landed a powerful slap on my face. I was going to fight back because my mother always told me that if someone hits me, hit them back. It was impossible. George blocked my punch. He carried me as if I weighed nothing and slammed me to the bed. I thought it was a tactic to make me calm down or to push me away from him. George climbed on top of me immediately and started his act of madness.

As much as I tried to fight, push and kick, it was impossible. He was stronger and tougher. He blocked all of my slaps and hits. Once I grew ferocious, he sent slaps my way. George was possessed by a demon because why else would he react like this? He started his plan by mauling my body. This time, he went for skin-to-skin contact by sticking his hands underneath my shirt. I was terrified," George, stop it right now!" Instead of that, he grabbed the top of my shirt and tore it. He tore it like it was a piece of paper, with so much ease. While I was still recovering from the shock, he went ahead to raise my skirt up.

A switch went off in my head when he started to pull down my underwear. No one could tell me otherwise. He wanted to rape me. He grabbed my hands and pinned them to the bed. He muttered so close to me. I could smell the alcohol on his breath when he said," Stop resisting, or I'll kill you."

You can imagine hearing that from your boyfriend, plus in this context, I wasn't going to try him. While I was still recovering from the threat, George started placing feathery kisses on my body. His waist rotated against mine, and I could feel his hard erection, and it nauseated me. For the very first time, it made me sick.

I screamed, yelled, begged him, begged God; George was intent on his act. When he succeeded in taking off my underwear, he looked back at my face. His smirk terrified me. He briefly pulled down his pants and prepared for contact. "Please, please, please." I couldn't hold it in anymore. I started to sob. I thought about how this act could ruin my life. It would give me trust issues for the rest of my life. I knew about the effect of rape; I wasn't ready to experience it. Tears streamed down my bruised cheeks," Please, George. I'm begging you." That's when he came back to me. He started by releasing the tight hold on my body. "Please." I muttered," Please, please, please." You know how a switch is so quick. George's human self was back. He quickly climbed off me.

I straightened up and used the pillow to cover my body. I could tell he wanted to explain, but what on earth could he say to make things better? "Sarah.." He attempted to come closer. I immediately screamed," Don't come near me!" He maintained the distance, "I swear I am so sorry. I don't know what happened_" "I need to use the restroom," I mentioned out of the blue. He nodded," Just listen to me first." I sniffed and ordered him, "Pass me my bag," He looked back at the black bag," Sarah…." "Please." I would have gotten it myself, but fear restricted me. I didn't want to go anywhere close to him. What if he tries to do it again?

He reached out for the bag and then stretched it out to me. With shaky hands, I grabbed it. I needed to call my brother. He sat on the bed, and I immediately scurried back," George, no." "Sarah, please, listen to me…." He took deep breaths," I won't touch you; I won't hurt you. Just listen." "No, please, I beg you. I need space." With the pain still radiating over me, I stood up. Before he could hold me, I rushed into the bathroom and slammed the door in his face. "Sarah, open the door." He said on the other end. I leaned against the door and unlocked my phone. "Sarah, I wasn't going to rape you." He tried to explain," I was just….."

He knew that there was nothing in the world that could make this better. "I was upset and reacted harshly; I'm sorry." He said. Sincerity laced his tone, and I bet that he was sorry, but I wasn't willing to take the chance. I quickly called my big brother to come and pick me up. As usual, he tried to mock me," So now, I'm your Uber driver. Why should I come and pick you up by 12 am in the night?"

"Please, just come." "Your legs carried you there; it can bring you back home." "Yomi_" That's when George's fist collided with the door, and he yelled," SARAH, I SAID I'M FUCKING SORRY!" I let out squeaks as he pounded on the door. That's when Yomi knew I was serious. He asked frantically," What's going on?" "Please, just come, please." I pleaded with him.

George still continued to yell at me; I blocked my ears and prayed to God for a miracle. What if he found his way inside the bathroom, he could finish what he started and kill me. "Will you ruin this relationship because of this?" He asked me in a silent tone. Would I really? I waited in the bathroom for Yomi to show up. I couldn't bear to see George after his atrocious act. I almost fell asleep until I heard my brother's raging tone. It seemed that he was confronting George. I quickly stepped out, not sure who to protect, but I knew Yomi had terrible anger and George… who knew what he could do?

Yomi had George in his arms, yelling in his face. I stepped in the middle to stop him from unleashing hell on him, even if he deserved it. You can imagine my brother seeing me in my situation- torn clothes, bruises, and scattered hair; he was livid. I picked up my jacket and covered myself with it. "What happened?" He asked. Sadness overwhelmed me, and I started to cry. Yomi was struck with confusion, and I knew he was trying to hold himself. George tried to hold me to apologize again," Babe, I'm sorry." Yomi flew off the handle and shouted," I'll kill you if you touch my sister again!"

"Let's go." I dragged Yomi out of the house with my strength. I knew deep in my heart that my brother would return to George to finish up the job he had started. During the ride home, Yomi flooded me with questions about George. I couldn't bring myself to say it. One is because Yomi would go ballistic and kill George. Two, because I wasn't sure if I was dreaming or not. My sweet boyfriend tried to rape me. George kept reaching out after that day. He visited once, and I threatened him with a knife. I had lost faith and trust in him. I was conflicted. Do I give him a second chance, or do I protect myself?

I chose the latter. I wasn't going to risk it. I broke up with him and blocked him on all social networks. My friends were confused about my decision. I couldn't bring myself to say it. I didn't want his reputation to be tainted. The experience left a huge scar on me. Dayo urged me to speak to him, but I refused. George's five minutes of madness terrified me. I thought about it," what if he had gone through with it?" Would I be alive now? Would I still be the same person? Love doesn't always mean everything. 

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